Trapped and frustrated

Dear Magda,

Hi, I am an Au pair in New York City. It has been 2 months since I started, and I recently realized that I do not like children at all. I take care of two boys, 6 and 9 years old, They don’t have any problem. They are well behaved, very nice to me. Just whenever I see them, I feel trapped and frustrated. I don’t want to quit because I really love to live in the city, and I think being an Au Pair is the only way for me to legally stay here right now. What should I do?

Dear Au Pair,
When you work as a babysitter or an au pair, you must like children. Can you imagine a good driver who doesn’t like driving, or a good cook who doesn’t like cooking? Naturally, there are kids who can be very rude, moody and picky, and your job is not easy then, however if the boys you’re taking care of are nice, the problem really lays in you. I don’t know how old you are; perhaps you’re too young to take a part is such a program. Didn’t you like the children you had babysat in your own country before you came to the US? I know the life in New York City is pretty exciting for most of the au pairs, but you must be aware of the fact that you have to take your job seriously. If you really feel trapped and frustrated (as you said) when the kids are around you, you should quit. Contact your community counselor and tell this person about your problem. You can’t keep doing this only because you want to stay in NYC. Instead of being an au pair, you may try to change your visa to a student visa (F-1) and study at an American college. I think it would be the best solution to your problem. Start searching for a school in the area you would like to stay in, and choose the program you’re interested in. Maybe you’ll have the chance to start your studies immediately, if not, you’ll have to go back to your country and apply for a place at one of the American universities from there. I’ll keep my fingers crossed for you. Good luck:)

Magda